DANI'S FABULOUS FIFTH BIRTHDAY BASH!

 Dani's turning five today!  The time has gone so fast from kittenhood to now, that I can hardly believe it.

This is Dani kitten before she came home 

to us at eleven weeks of age.

So Dani's throwing a party at our house (hopefully she'll pick it up afterwards).  You're all invited, too, if you want to drop by!  Get ready to mingle with some real angels, Dante, Dylan and Domino, and a mystery angel who shall be nameless for the nonce.

Of course, the earthbound are well represented, too.  Otherwise it would just be tangled wings and a big heap of feathers with a 'Halo Kitty' scattered here and there.

It's getting pretty wild, so I hope the raucus ruckus won't keep anyone at bay.  The cake is quite speCATular!  Made with cats in mind it's adorned with pink and blue fish.  The concept comes from the mind of Dr. Suess except his "One Fish, Two Fish" were red and blue.

Aside from the fishy cake there are bowls of gourmet kibble efurrywhere, party-style cat treats, and catnip for the taking (if you don't take it, it won't have that party, party, party effect).  Of course fresh water is always available, and milk for those who are so inclined.  We like to keep our guests well hydrated. 

And for your collective entertainment, Dani is hosting a special night at her comedy club, at your pleasure, as well as hers.

Feel free to use the litter boxes in the laundry room, and don't worry because the washer and dryer will not be turned 'On'.

Here's the lineup:  

June of Zoolatry

Domino of Wendy's 3-D Cats

Dylan & Dante of Wendy's 3-D Cats

Dante of All About Lacocoon Dante

Sox, Guest Star of O Dani Girl

Dani of O Dani Girl

Mystery Guests

June already had her V-8.  There's always Vroom for juice -- especially Jus de Mousie.

Organically soiled!

After asking "Wot's LEFT any more?", Dante becomes an ardent supporter of TRANS RIGHTS!

Dante, Master of 'Marshmallow Arts'.

"Eau de litterbox" -- my fafurite!

 

Pearls of Wisdom from his nibbles, Harry Styles!

HISStory versus History

They're both One-of-a-Kind! (luckily they each represent different Kinds).

We hope you enjoyed the show.  Stick around and mingle, tingle, dingle and dangle.  But don't hang out on the roof in case you inadvertently catch a shingle or two -- or more.

     

May she live long and prosPURR!

 

WORDLESS WEDNESDAY WITH DANI: HALF AND HALF

DANI & FRIENDS: OFF THEIR ROCKERS

 Dani's doing her comedy collective early this week because she's making a special post for Friday.  

There's a lot of bad language today, I guess she was feeling kind of feisty and invited the like-minded.

"Like I mind? -- NOT!" says Dani.

Here today in support of Dani is her nephew Sox, a very suggestive mystery kitty from my Cheezburger Days,  Angel-Gracie of Brian's Home, June of Zoolatry who is surprisingly open, and bringing up the rear, my secretive friend's three cats, Baby, Hagrid and Freiya. 

Dani's been influenced by the Austin Powers that be.

That shit looks like it was kicked outta that chicken.

Wait!  Could this be a case of deja-poo?

These guys (and gals) are all into flapstick comedy.  So if you hear any funny noises, it's just one of them flappin' their gums.

Q.  What do flappurrs eat for breakfast?  

A.  Flap-jacks.

Q.  What do you call it when a flappurr's in a hurry?  

A.  Flapdash.

Q.  What do you call a flappurr who likes to sucker punch?  

A.  Flap happy!

Q.  What is insulting to a flappurr?  

A.  A flap in the face.

Q.  What do you call it when a couple of flappurrs get frisky.  

A.  A bit of flap and tickle.

 

I think Sox means "EFFIGY", but close enough.  Sox has lost all of his PURRks since he's off wicker -- no more filet minion for him!

Wait until the insurance adjuster gets a load of this!

Angel-Gracie's getting off EASY this time.  Probably cuz she's wingy!

And this one comes with his own hot sauce, too!

Told you they were off their rockers!

Looks like a pre-school for PURRverts.

    ROCK ON!

DANI AND A CHICK NAMED D.

 It appears that Dani may actually be in the "catbird seat".

However, appearances are deceiving.  The sweet little chickadee is in the superior position.  Looking down on someone can be intimidating -- especially if you're the one who's dating Tim.

Dani's size is a disadvantage in this case, as the gravity of the situation becomes evident.  Her Maine Coon butt is going nowhere fast, whereas D. Chick-a-D is as light as a pile of feathers and winged to boot.  A shake of her booty and she's off!

So Dani's best strategy is to stay absolutely still.  However, as 'still waters run deep' she is soon in an awkward predicament.  The litter box is inside and currently inaccessible due to the locked door between here and there.  And while peeing in place seems like a viable option, wet fur is even heavier, and the pooling liquid is potentially slipPURRy.

The snow now seems like the best option, but poor Dani first has to acknowledge that she has lost this battle, as Chicky-D. does her Dee Dance.  Simply too humiliatin'!

Efurrything has gotten too 'out of hand' 

as the next photo will illustrate.

 

"How come burds get hand-outs whilst I can't even budge an inch before I gets ta eat?" complains Dani.

Perhaps you should budge-it better in the first place, says I.

"I'm gonna hasta get a liddle more cagy." says she.

Well, we can all see how that worked out.

And the moral of the story is:

"A bird in the hand is worth more than a cat in a cage."

DANI'S TIME CAPSULE

Dani has gone far and wide, back and forth in time, to assemble this collection of both current and past cat memes attributed to her Mama.  For today's finale she has even ventured into times yet to be.

Dani starts things off, as usual, and her guest stars include June of Zoolatry, The Cherry City Kitties, Mama's squirrel friend from the old days before that tree was cut down, an unidentified cat chin (too bad we couldn't catch it entirely), and Dolly of Brian's Home in an extraordinary capture.  Whew!

Dani has labelled each picture where it falls on the Timeline, i.e., Past, Present and/or Future.  She hopes each one encapsulates its peculiar place in Time.

PAST

The word 'faux' used in front of any given word makes you question the reality of the falsity.  Witness ...

Faux-Thought means you are wrong.  

Faux-Cast means your local weather person was wrong AGAIN.  

Faux-Shadow means what you thought was your shadow belongs to someone else.

Faux-Tell means you're a liar.

Faux-Swear means it's something you made up to be rude.

Faux-Ever means it's over.

FAUX-REAL is an oxymoron, so it's totally meaningless. (More on this later.)

PAST 

 Unfortunately Dani's output seems to be greater than her input (which is rather piddly really), and frankly speaking there's nowhere to put the output except to let it fall on the snow or run down Dada's leg.  In this case, sharing is definitely NOT a good idea.

PRESENT

Because in this case you'd actually think you were better than yourself.  It could definitely lead to some psychological trauma.

PAST

Here are Dexter, Tipp and Harry of the "Cherry City Kitties". 

Even if you don't shoot your mouth off, they will!

PAST

Neither sleet, nor rain, nor snow will keep a squirrel from its appointed rounds.  Freezing temperatures, however, may make it reschedule its appointment.

PAST

This one goes back so far I don't know who the kitty is.

Chilling your chin keeps more chinny-chin-chins from rearing their ugly jowls.

PRESENT

Must be a case of tipPURRary amnesia!

In other words there's no more "I" in your IQ 

(or Q in your Q-tip).

PRESENT & FUTURE

"Sister Dolly finally meets her nemeSIS" says Brian.

WORDLESS WEDNESDAY WITH DANI: ICE TEA, ANYONE?

  

LACOCOON DANI: FRIENDS & SOME VERY STRANGE STRANGERS

 Dani was busy all weekend long assembling this gaggle of goofs.  Some of the usual suspects are here, but there's more than one strange face amongst them.  Baby is the first stranger and he belongs to my friend's daughter. Baby comes up with the most eccentric PAWStures -- he's a natural for this kind of thing.  And then there were three (strangers, that is) -- the aforementioned Baby along with his two co-horts who belong to my friend, herself.  They all look pretty similar, but the two latest additions are formerly feral Freiya in the cat tree, and her brofur Hagrid, relaxing beside Baby in the middle.

June of Zoolatry purrforms her customary guest-starring role, as does my grandkitty Sox, sepurrately.  And this week, Brian of Brian's Home is also joining us with a bit of nostalgia from the Cheezburger days.

I hope you will find this assortment of cat comedians, pleasing.

Heeeeeeeeeeer's Dani ...

Now that's an ultiMATE HIM if I've ever heard one!  To the commitment-shy, I say 'Do as you're told'.

Now let's all sing a chorus of 'GNOME, GNOME on the Range'.

(and I hope you have the range to do it!)

When Baby comes down off his THIGH HIGH, he's gonna need to restore blood flow to that leg.

(Can't get much Stranger than that!)

Now there'll be no chasing the chaste.  But if, by some chance you do, go for a little strange instead of your sister.  Pleas!

June's MineMom has kissed her SO much with salty lips that she can savour the flavour until the next time Mom sucks her face.  Suckah!

Uh-oh!  June didn't like that very much 'cause she's launched an attack of her own.  We'll just pretend we didn't see it and leave her alone to let off more steam.

Hopefully, Sox has learned his lesson so it's all 'just ducky' from now on.

 

Chicks are just gonna think Brian's one of their own.  They'll do his make-up and lend him some feathers for a boa.  

All aboa'd da crazy-train!

DANI: IN AND OUT OF THE HOOD

 Dani has found a new PET hate.  Oddly enough it's not hats.  After going on and on about winter wear last week, you'd think that winter hats would be at the top of her "I Hate Hats" list.

But no, Dani has found something much, much worse -- HOODS!  If you're in your own 'hood wearing a hood, nobody is going to recognize you.  However the real problem comes from not being able to see anyone or anything whilst you're in any given 'hood sporting a hood.

   

This is nothing 'new since' hoods have been a 'nuisance' ever since they were invented.

As the last picture in the hat collage will show, most hoods aren't fitted, so the edge of the hood falls directly over your eyes thereby impairing your vision.

Hats, on the other hand (er paw) sit nicely atop the head, allowing for a clear line of sight.  They also come in various colours, styles and textures which allows you to change up your look (which is, after all, of utmost importance, especially if your name is Dani).

"Dere is wun hood dat I like", says she.

Really?  Do tell.

"ROBIN HOOD!" exclaims Dani.

She's a supurr cool bird, an' she's gotta reely HOT HAT.  Hats is supposta keep yoor head warm anyway, but her hat hassa bilt-in heatah.  Sure beats dose drafty ol' hoods any time.  Miss Robin is like a liddle hot watah bottle an' she just luvs ta cuddle.

So the moral of the story is:  

DON'T LET ANYBUDDY HOODWINK YOU

(no matter how cute they are!)

We are thankful for all the hats in the world that keep our heads warm, and all of the birds who do so much for this planet.