DOGGED DANI DOES IT AGAIN

 Dani's very thankful for her Dada, and takes after him in a lot of ways (especially when he doesn't do what she wants.)

Except Dani's drinking a catnip cocktail and Dada's drinking ale (which is really just the same as beer but somewhat more substantial).

Dani says: "Sum peeples calls it 'da hair of da dog' wen yoo drinks alcohol ta help yoor hangovah.

I jus' can't imagine dat undah any cirkumstances."

"I Shih Tzu not, I wud gag if I had ta eat any dog hair!" she declares.

"O noes -- it efun has eyes!  Quick, get me sum hair colour so

I kin De-Eye it.

"Doan get me wrong, I has plenty a' hairballs of my own, but

I only gags on dem on da way owt.  An' no stray hairs!"

("Pee Ess: Why duz dey call dem hairballs anyway, cuz dey shur doan looks like balls?")

But Dani digresses.  She has lots of ideas about what to do with dog hair:

"Be a hair dressah. Yoo kin dress 'em an' den doo dere makeup."

"Make sum angel-hair pasta."

Must be dog hair from Rod Stewart's mutt!

"Make a wig an' den use it fur bed hair."

"Yoo kin make souvenirs of Prince Hairy an' sell dem on eBay.

Maybe yoo cud make it a ''Two-Fur'.  If yoo buy two, dey kin

 DUKE it owt between demselves."

Thankfully, Dani is coming to the end of this flight of fancy.  She sure can go a long way off the flight path. We started by talking about Dada's hangover!  I guess it was "The Hair of the Dog" that did it.

Dani, you have no FILTER.

"Yes, I duz.  I'm on SNAPCAT.  Yoo shud give it a try."

WORDLESS WEDNESDAY WITH DANI: LIE LIKE A LILAC

 

DANI: LATHER, RINSE, REPEAT

 Dani's rather miffed right now, but I'll let her tell the story.

"Efurryfing wuz jus' fine dis mornin'.  I wuz relaxin' on da front porch an' I jus' didn't see it comin'. My Dada picked me up an' took me back inside da howse." says she.  

LATHER 

" Next fing I noo I wuz in da tub wif soap on my head!!!  I wuz pretty ticked off cuz I keeps MYself verry clean, fank yoo very much.  Wot's dis all abowt?"

FLEA & TICK SHAMPOO

"Mama tole me dis wuz for my own gud an' wud help me get ridda anyfing dat wuz buggin' me. Apparently I'm gonna be even more TICKED off aftah dis."

RINSE 

"At furst I keep'd my eyes closed cuz I didn't want dem ta watah."

"Den I flash'd my sideways stink eye fur da camera."

"Finally, I says ENUFF IS ENUFF an' got outta da tub."

REPEAT

"So I fawtid.  Dey said I shud repeat it, so I fawtid again."  says Dani seemingly quite proudly.

After she shook herself off, Dani had something very deep to say about this whole experience.  She's back on the front porch just air-drying.

"Tub be or not tub be, dat is da question

An' I says please jus’ ‘Let It Be'

Excuse me now, I gotta flea."

DANI'S COMEDY: MUG SHOT!

Dani’s usually not very happy with me when I want her to pose for a photo shoot.  You can see she’s 

giving me the sideways stink eye.

So to thwart me, and to make her opinion known, she has gone to a lot of trouble to make this outrageous visual statement.

What you are about to see is nothing less than a MUGGING!

“It took months a huggah-muggahry ta pull off dis feet.”  says Dani quite proudly.

Editor’s Note 1:  Hugger-Muggery = Secrecy

Editor’s Note 2:  In this context, feet = feat.  Obviously Dani did not pull off one of her feet (she merely obscured it).

“Aftahwards I wonder’d wot I cud PAWSibly do wif all dese mugs.”

“Dat’s wen I order’d da buttahmilk” says she.  “But da fools at da grossery store switch’d out da regulah buttahmilk fur dat PIDDLIN' one purr cent variety.  Wot cud be grosser dan dat?”

Editor’s Note 3:  No human or animal has taken a wiz in this milk.

“Who makes buttahmilk an’ den cuts down on da buttah?” asks Dani incredulously.

"So I put sum moar buttah on top."

Here's a picture of Dani's pitcher.

Yello!!!

Editor's Note 4:  Yello = Hello

"So I decidid ta pour summa dat buttahmilk into my mug.

My head fitted in dere pretty good." says she ignoring the spillage.

Even Dani's 'mug' on the mug has a taste for it.  The buttermilk, that is. I'm sure you already know that mug means face as well as a handled-drinking cup, but unfortunately for Dani it also means a PURRSon or a Pussycat who is quite GULLible.

Duh!

Then Dani went online and came across a bunch of pictures of kittens in cups.  Here's but one of them:

"Mine is a cup size Dubble “A” says this little cutie-pie.

Editor’s Note 5:   Dubble A = Extra Small

Then the not-so-stupid side of Dani came up with a fabulous idea.

"Why shud kittens be de only wuns who kin fit inside a mug?  I calls dat Size Discriminashun" she says as she sighs.

I wanna has summa dat ackshun, too!"

So, as is her wont, Dani ordered a 'bespoke' mug in the SuPURR Size, and paid homage to Extra-Small Kittens for the insPURRation they provided by having their faces plastered all over it.

Editor's Note 6:   "Bespoke" basically means if you really want something, speak up about it and then ask somebody to make it for you (in exchange for the big bucks).

Why's choice, Dani.

And by the way, thank you -- I actually got a genuine mug shot of you this time!

And finally, to end this spectacle, here is another great internet find which is spurring Dani to use her expurrtise as an influencer in the Cat Blogosphere.  To wit:  "Cats in Mugs Emojis".

Editor's Note 7:   Feel free to make a copy of this from Dani's blog, if you like.  You can also find it online as a free download if you prefer.  Just Google "Cats in Mugs Emojis".

O noes!  I put this kitty to sleep.

If you made it this far, I hope I can’t say the same for you.

WORDLESS WEDNESDAY WITH DANI: HEARTS, FLOWERS AND TOWERS

DANI: IT'S O-FISH-ALL!

 Dani is showing off her latest acquisition.

Great necklace, Dani!  Where's the best place to fish for something like that? 

"Why ONLINE acourse!" says she.

"But careful or yoo mite get HOOKED."

Here are a few fishy necklaces that Dani found online, from the most expensive to the least:

(P.S.  Just click on the image to make it larger if you like.)

This is the most expensive because it's 14K gold.  It's a little diamond-finned blowfish blowing sapphire bubbles.  Ain't she cute? 

This one is less expensive because it's in silver, but it's still up there because of all the semi-precious gems.  The stone in the pendant is a blue topaz and the amethyst and aquamarine encrusted fish is a Betta Fish.  You "betta" he's pricey!

Now this one is quite interesting though not overly costly.  It's a multi-strand necklace with faux pearls, stone chips and metallic silver fish.  Most of all it has a great name. It's called "The Fish and Chips" necklace.  I could go for a little bit of that right now!

This simple little necklace is kind of fun -- especially if you want to get your TARP ON.  The tarpon fish is dangling from what they call a "lariat" chain.  So I guess instead of a fishing rod you're supposed to catch it with a rope?

And finally, we have the bare bones necklace at a rock bottom price.  The necklace is rhodium plated metal and the teal stone isn't real, although it is a reel eyecatcher! 

"I still likes my necklace da best" declares Dani.

"Anyway, I shur won't be swappin' dis ...

... fur dis, anytime soon!" says Dani.

But what about THIS, Dani?

DANI'S COMEDY: HAMMING IT UP!

 Dani's having a fine time today.

She has always been curious about how pigs fly, and was really looking forward to more than just a whiff of that ham.  

"I always fawt pigs had ta trot down a runway ta take off."  says Dani. "Acourse now I noes dat it's wind powah dat reely duz it."

"I jus' hope piggy duzn't get da TROTS once it's airborne."

"Da only fing worse dan a flyin' poo, is a poo wif EYES!"

"Dey efun has fancy goggles so dey kin find yoo at nite.”

"Right on target!" says Pooh, chuckling away.

Dani says:  “Before yoo pooh-poohs de idea, I has wun more suggestion. An' I has filed it undah MISSILE-aneous."

"Dis way dere's no trottin' or wind powah needid fur take-off. 

An' yoo gets ware yoor goin' a whole lot fastah!"

Well done, Dani. Here's your reward.

It's a good deal any way you slice it.  And best of all you're not in hock to anybody since it's free.

HAMMING IT UP SURE HAS ITS ADVANTAGES

 IN THE LONG RUN.  TROT ON!

.